Old is as Old does

My sweet, sweet grandfather is in town to get a surgery on his shoulder and that means we get to spend time with him. YAY!! Yesterday I went to hospital to visit the old man and I am happy to say that he is doing well. My father, Papa(grandfather) and I got to talking about getting older and having adult children and all that nonsense. I think it feels weird to be an adult, but both Dad and Papa said it wasn't weird...just logical path. This is where I tell you that I am very different from both the elder fellas, I am not typically the most practical in my thought process. I tend to think of things more abstractly, whereas, they think more realistically and concretely. So as I am having these existential moments in the hospital room, I notice that the conversation has drifted to bowel movements, perforated colons and the such....I love my grandfather, but I in no way want to hear that conversation, so I stepped into the hallway and wandered the halls. I think that this might have been one of the few times that I haven't gotten faint-like in the hospital, which I chalk up to mere luck. I have never been in the hospital for myself and therefore I find it very suspicious as to why I get sick when I am in such a facility. My papa and father said it was all in my head(again logical) but why? I had a friend tell me story about her brother in the hospital and I got faint-like...weird I know. If anyone can enlighten me to this phenomenon, it would be greatly appreciated.

Anywho, to the crux of the blog...old is as old does. I think our actions speak of our maturity in life and how we wan to be perceived. My Papa is 83 and he acts as though he is a much younger man. I act like a much younger girl...sometimes. I say this because in a culture obsessed with youth, I always want to be perceived as young, hip and with it, but I am coming to grips with my maturity and adulthood. Obviously, as this has been a common theme to my blog most recently.

As I dive into what my adult life is going to look like I am going cherish the time that I get to spend learning how to act my age and whatever that feels like...so in logical years I might be 27, but I feel more like 22, and my maturity and wisdom....well I will leave that for you to decide(because it might vary based upon what you know about me).

Cheers for getting better with age...and feeling better too,

APK

I might get burgled...

I think I am in love with the word burgled...it kind of sounds like a noise. In fact when I use this word I am referring to the action of a burglary...which after this morning I am sure that I am safe against...maybe. So I locked my keys in my apartment, much to my dismay I was able to retrieve such items because I was determined , smart and crafty with my resources. My resources were a bent up hanger that I found in the shed in back yard. In my infinite wisdom I left my kitchen window open(score), but that damn little dowel rod is preventing me from opening my window all the way...plan foiled, not the case. Just call me, uh...hmmm, whatever you call someone who is a mastermind burglar. I took that bent hanger and took my time trying to get that silly little rod out of the groove in my window. After about twenty minutes, I was safely hopping down through the window. I must say that it was a stoke of luck that I had left the window open or that I had found a bent hanger to use, but I was sublimely happy with my "break in". Now I only have to worry about any other smart, determined person who might stumble upon my little nook. Like I said I can't make this stuff up...

Here's to ingenuity and a little hard work...

APKilla

REDO #3

In an attempt to write this blog today, I suddenly have writers block...why, I usually have plenty of mishaps to tell the world about. In an attempt to get real with the world(aka the small amount of you that read this), I am struggling with my status quo...the status of affairs in my life. I seem aimless and I find it hard to motivate myself to more of what I want and less of what I despise...in my mind that seems like the most ridiculous statement. To qualify the statement I must say the things that I despise are laziness, bitching about the state of affairs(whatever they are), serious lack of purpose, and lack of movement(in my heart, mind, body and soul). The sad thing is that I have complete control over every one of these situations in my life and yet here I am complaining that I sitting in the middle of all of them. Separately they feel manageable but lumped together it seems like an Everest to tackle....oh I know that I can get after each of them separately but I am also an impatient person who wants life to get itself together on my timing and in an orderly fashion as not to mess up my sensibilities and hair. The revelation that I am much more in control of my circumstances is troubling, only because I don't think that I can be trusted with such serious matters. Have I regressed since college? It seems as though I am on this slippery slope of insecurity in which I don't trust who I have become...all these realizations feel foreign to me which leads me to believe that I have too much time on my hands to think about my stuff. Getting stuck in my head is a horrible place to be, only because my head always runs to worst case scenario or it lacks of being grounded in reality. Argh.

Once my life was thought to be precarious(I actually looked that one up, had to make I was using it right) but as I sit here in a wonderfully full coffee house in Boulder(the Cup) I am struck with the weight of my choices in life and I am coming to the grips with the great position that I am in. Fresh from rest and seeking a renewed vigor for life, I must stand firm in the truths of who I am and forge through life with laughter, grace, humility and a undeniable knowledge that I am responsible for the state in which I choose....damn the odds.

Far more serious than I ever intended,

APK