Sunday, January 29, 2012


I have a particular OCD, I call it OCD primarily to be clever ecause I know real, honest OCD is heart-breaking. My particular itch is matching, head to toe, inside to outside. Most of the time it looks a lot like matching my shoes with a particular accessory, or socks to underwear, or jewelry. My dear, lovely friend Ali calls me matchy-matchy, to which she is extremely correct. I feel good when I have planned an outfit that goes together and shows my fashion savvy. When I don't match, I feel as though something is a little off. I can still function but I usually wish I had done laundry. Time to draw the parallel to my heart and the state of affairs there. So I feel completely mismatched, I know that I am happy with my life, where I am going and the new things coming down the pipe feelings aren't matching up. I feel sad. This feeling comes up every so often and I often share it with the world. I feel sad because I crave more than I have. I want the love of a man, the comfort of a home, security of a savings account and satisfaction of a life lived to full potential. So as I sit here, off of one of the best weekends in a long time, I will embrace the sadness and also choose to see my reality.

My reality: 
I am happy because of the freedom if singleness, a job that I love(and my needs covered), people who love me and a full life ahead of me, ready to reach all its potential. I am finding that life, as matchy-matchy as I would like it, has a bit of accessories that may not match the shoes, but complement them in a new way that draws people in to take a closer look. I am going to step out into life with my favorite shoes and just hope that life's accessories draw me in to take a closer look: at who I am, who I will be and what adventures I will take...and be satisfied with the state of affairs inside and out.

My clutch may match my heels, but I am aiming to try something new, so please have grace with me. And please tell me when I am making a complete idiot of myself: fashion or otherwise.


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